OK I am sorry!
No I am not:
Dead/seriously ill/kidnapped/ had a mental breakdown /in the throws of a passionate love affair or any other such disaster.
I have to admit there were all good guesses from you for the reason reasons I’ve not updated the blog for 2 months, but alas, wrong.
The actual reasons are:
1) Well to be frank, there was all that politics malarkey which was all a bit too grown up and serious for my liking! BOOOOOORING!!
But for those of you who care about world affairs (as come on in all faith I’ve never pretended to, have I?!!); red ones got in, green ones got a bit pissed off, so a few of them had a tantrum and started being naughty. They got done and told off and everyone in their cities was grounded for being bad (not sure if they all had to sit on the naughty step or not, but certainly they had to be in bed for 7pm) As none of the other green ones in the country wanted to get in trouble they just behaved themselves so the bad ones just gave up trying and after week everyone was good again. So after a month of virtual shut down for intense political rallies, shut down for the Election Day, shut down for the result announcements and intense celebrations and/or strops – nothing is different! Eat your heart out Nick Robinson!!
2) My new friends:
I’m proud to introduce to you my present guests who took up residence in my digestive system some time ago, and despite looking all cute and friendly have caused me no end of trouble. Parasites eh, you gotta love em!! So these little beasties have been making me feel a little bit pants to be honest. Part of their frolics in my gut has been playing hide and seek with the stuff I put inside me, like my other medication, which meant other parasites could come and play too. Well I can tell you the malarial ones who they let in, were not gentlemanly at all, and made me feel proper poorly one week.
Anyway sadly today the eviction notice has been served on these little buggers and so soon they will be on their way and hopefully I will be back to enjoying my pegapacks in no time. (Although to be honest how they have survived the pegapack attack is beyond me!!)
But do you know what pisses me off the most? Its not that I could only eat one helping of Xmas dinner. Or that I have been going into nice restaurants and not being in the least bit interested by the menu. Not is it the fatigue which had me closing my eye’s during my favorite film of all time (Les Mis in case I haven’t bored you, even despite the fact Russel Crow should be ashamed of himself and shot for lack of professional integrity and that performance) No it’s the fact that these particular beasties are not even bloody exotic or classed as a tropical disease - you can catch them in the UK - I’ve been conned I tell you!! Worst still, look at the little blighters - there with their smiley effing faces, only I could get infested with something that looks like Casper the Friendly Ghost!
Anyway despite being a holiday camp for a group of protozoa I have still had some amazing times in the past 2 months and plenty of those ‘moments’ when I wonder where the candid camera’s are hidden. A particular precious time was the International Day of Disability on the 3rd of December, where I found myself to be the only white person marching through the streets of Bo city amongst 200 disabled people. I wouldn’t mind but they made me wear a t-shirt which I had to put over my existing clothes and then had to walk in blazing heat. To be honest I needed a friggin’ wheelchair at the end of it, and a surgeon to remove the 2 layers of clothes plastered to my body! But Oh no, I was then dragged up onto the stage at the local city hall at the ‘insistence’ of the mayor and city commissioners and made to give an impromptu speech to the TV crew and ensemble which had grown ever larger. I will not beat about the bush. I was shit! Really shit!
It was then topped off at the local amputee football match whereby I stole the show, much to the frustration of the awe-inspiring players, when all eyes turned to me when a local woman decided it was time I should learn how to put on the native head dress – yeah ‘cos that’s what I needed, more layers!!
All this humiliation and I’d bloody paid for the day (well the charity had)!
Other special times have happened since coming back and realizing that I am totally blessed to be surrounded by such amazing friends and family. OK one or two moments have also been quite harrowing, like the appearance of a dear old friend in a onesie. I mean I’ve seem some sites this past 12 months in Africa but nothing prepared me for that horror. (You know who you are and it’s not right and it’s not proper and you should be thoroughly ashamed of yourself!!)
But still, I continue to be amazed by the fact I’m so very blessed to have so many of you in my life, keeping me strong and sane and making sure I have special times when I’m here and supporting me in your own ways when I’m not.
So I suppose I am saying ‘thank you’, for all the support and encouragement you have given me. You see the reason I am not, dead/seriously ill/or had a mental breakdown is in part due to all of you who have helped me cope in your own individual ways (well except for the stranger reading this, after stumbled across it and being attracted to the picture of Casper – sorry to disappoint you mate I’m just a rambling aid worker with parasites and long suffering friends & family).
But its also thanks to your support, and the knowledge that you’re there that soon going to take a deep breath and right dive back in. Mental I know – maybe I did have that breakdown after all! But before I go I have a few more preparations to do. It will definitely involve eating lots more cake and being scrubbed down with a brillo pad!
Happy 2013 everyone.
And Thank You for 2012. It’s been one hell of an adventure!
Xxx
