Friday, 27 January 2012

Meat

OK I have survived a whole week.

 I say survived as clearly I am seen as a fodder for the local insect and parasitic life forms. Seriously the mini monsters here are vicious to the extent that I am covered in little red mountains across my ankles, calves, thighs, hips, nipple – yeah that’s rights, I did say nipple – clearly one little fecker fancied something a little more exotic than my type A+ . If that wasn’t enough, for some reason wherever I have these bites I also develop a large bruise to complete the look.  Now I can’t work out if this is from the vigorous slapping of myself when under attack, which,  if observed from a distance may look like an form of self stimulation or I suppose an extension of my naked tribal shower dance. Or maybe the bruises are from the poison injected into me by the Mozzies so that they ‘go large’ on their order.  Oh well, next to the pearly white skin dotted with red lumps the blue/black smudges add a nice artistic touch!

The search for my new apartment has progressed and mid week it looked like I had found not 1 but potentially 4 places to stay. They were all in the nicer part of town up a hill with a splendid view overlooking the Atlantic, all with private generators and water tanks, and most were huge with 3 bedrooms/3 bathrooms . In the end though I decided to reject comfort and convenience and not to take any of them. For now I will stay in this delightful little hovel, where I sit typing by candle light and splattering Mozzies which are attracted by the light of the screen before realising its just a short hop to a tasty snack (don’t worry, my breasts are not exposed)!
Bathroom

Kitchen



My reasons for deciding to stay are complicated but simply the location of the apartments was just too isolating for me and the size alone would make me feel extremely lonely. At least here I can walk to (one of the few) supermarkets and do a bit of shopping. There I would have to always rely on a driver or worse, tackle driving one of the  4X4’s myself – and the bloody controls are on the wrong side, as well as them driving on the wrong side (and I thought this was an ex-British colony). This is before mentioning the kamikaze approach to driving that people take on roads which are actually beyond description and not really fit for man nor beast!

Remember the poor Saint Helena wall and my police caution – I don’t think I can face the local equivalent just yet!! And right now I think I have used up my entire ‘brave’ quota for this month – I have no doubt that it will soon be replenished again and I will get behind that wheel.(Ooops – think I lost a sister to a heart attack there).

As to work – Mmmmmm, all I will say different party, same guests. But this time accompanied with a heavy French and/ or African accent. To be completely honest and just between you and me (and whoever else stumbles across these ramblings), I have absolutely no idea what’s going on at all as I probably only understand about 25% of what is said.  The nod has returned. As has the finger over the mouth trying to look inquisitive.  Occasionally I get out a notebook to and write a couple of words in it. That looks intelligent and organised right?

Seriously though how would you lot cope with unrelenting exposure to:

“sensitisation programmes” (is this to help people develop a phobia ??)

“capitalisation” (we want to set up a shop??)

“harmonisation” (I’m a member of the Von Trapp Family Singers??)

And these are just the words I actually caught.

 I think I’m involved in some serious shit though as this week I met the Deputy Director for the countries Health Service, and next week I am at a meeting at the Irish Embassy representing the federation…….

………..I think I like it when I’m just meat!!!

Love and stuff

Jo

xxx

P.s there appears to be some followers missing, do I do the name and shame now or give it another couple of weeks???






6 comments:

  1. Hope you are settling in ok-apart from being lunch for the local mozzies!! We miss you at work xx

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  2. Miss you good people too, miss the fact I understand the acronoms, but until I miss clincial governance and BT I'm staying put. Send love to everyone
    xxx

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  3. Yep ..... I nearly did have heart attack ...no driving !

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  4. But how difficult can it really be????????? xxx

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  5. "The nod has returned. As has the finger over the mouth trying to look inquisitive":
    Ah ... now I understand your response to my occasional ramblings! ;)

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