Confectionary Wars

Anyone who’s done a pre-departure training to work overseas in development will have been given the lecture on the moment you hit a wall.

This imaginary wall is the moment you stop, look round and think – “what the F*** am I doing here”. It is soon followed by a barrage of negative, derogatory comments about the host county (which at that point isn’t feeling too damn welcoming as a host) and the rose tinted glasses are replaced by cataracts of shite.

Well I think this week I met this wall at full force.

The final nail in the coffin was when I was gently warned that if I uphold a contract that a partner wants to abuse he may use black magic against me. Is that so?!!! So this is how some healthcare professionals cope then is it??

Gosh, I struggle to understand why with such advanced management approaches the life expectancy in this county is only 48, and why close to 9% of women die giving birth. It’s a mystery to me!

But its OK don’t panic as I’ve provided myself with proper protection from the Black Magic, by scoffing a whole box of After Eight mints. I thought about Mars Bars, as a first line of defense, you know with him being the Roman God of War but I figured that After Eights had that sticky white centre to neutralize the Black. I think its worked, as other than feeling a bit sickly I’m not experiencing any stabbing pains as if a needle is being stabbed into my effigy and no snakes have appeared in my bed.

I am not clear how long I need to continue using this protection or if I should switch to a different approach, not sure which though – Miniature Hero’s, or should I use a whole Galaxy???

But in all seriousness its week like this that you realize that it would take forever to really understand the culture here, if you ever could. And you also wonder how many scars the 10 year rebel war left on the basic psychology of the society.

As we approach the presidential elections next week I am noticing, what I can only describe as a subconscious fear and tension sweep through the population. Everyone, including the British Foreign and Commonwealth Office are optimistic that all will go smoothly.

However, more than once I’ve been talking to people and totally out of context to the conversation they start to talk about being captured by the rebels or the time they had to flee into the mountains to escape. It’s strange, as although everything is peaceful, and the last election happened without incident, its as if the political activity and uncertainty is evoking a latent, remnant fear in people from the time politics brought devastation to their lives.

People are moving closer to their families and not willing to do anything that takes them too far away from their loved ones. They appear fearful to make decisions or do anything that could be misconstrued politically, even in the most tenuous of ways.

But unfortunately this translates into behaviours which are unprofessional and neglectful of their responsibilities and include lying, stealing and deception. But this is how they appear to cope.

So how do I cope?? Well apart from eating boxes of overpriced confectionary I try to remember the hell people lived through, and the wounds that I have come to believe most people are still nursing deep within.

But its not easy, and my head hurts from hitting that wall…. or maybe my effigy has been dropped on the floor headfirst!